WEDDING PARTY OF TWO
I remember daydreaming about what my wedding would be like when I was little. I wondered who I would marry, what I’d be wearing and who would be there to celebrate with me. Unfortunately, when it came time to actually plan my wedding, there were a very different series of questions plaguing my mind. Should I even get married? Is it safe? Will anyone even come? COVID really fucked the entire world up, and I felt guilty for even thinking about the impact on my wedding. Full T? I was struggling, I was still mourning the loss of everything I had worked so hard to achieve in 2020. Ironically it was planning my wedding through all this chaos that helped me reverse course, pulling my head right out of my ass.
Erik and I knew we couldn’t have a wedding with all our friends, family and loved ones so we opted for the next best thing: a wedding, party of two. It wasn’t quite an elopement, or a traditional wedding. Much like our relationship, it was definitely “something else.” Everything was scaled down except for the details. When all is said and done and we get to the other side of this pandemic, we will absolutely be having a reception with everyone we love, but for now this blog will showcase all the details from our intimate wedding with you...from the story behind our rings (Greene & Co.), choosing the perfect location (Andaz Scottsdale), running you through our approach to decorating which utilized a white and rose gold color palette which was completed by Venus et Fleur’s stunning arrangements and our fabulous suits (Sandro Paris).
Like many other couples we started the process somewhere between extreme excitement and anxiety. As a gay couple we felt unsure how to take a heterosexual tradition and make it our own. Gay marriage is still very new and I wasn’t sure where to look for inspiration. There were so many decisions, which were exacerbated by the circumstances surrounding the pandemic and our back injuries. However, after talking to several of my close straight married friends I realized that the confusion and uncertainty I was experiencing wasn’t unique to being gay, but rather it was reflective of how big of a commitment marriage is to me and that I wanted our wedding too be special, to highlight our unconditional love. It was a pleasant reminder that at its core the human experience is universal; we aren’t so different after all!
All of my anxiety turned to excitement when we found our venue, The Andaz Scottsdale. Although we’ve lived in the Phoenix/Scottsdale area for several years, we only recently discovered the property. Its a magical oasis discreetly tucked behind the hustle of Scottsdale road. The property itself is stunning leaving you intoxicated by the lush landscaping and seamless flow between indoor and outdoor spaces across the 22 acre property. I would call it a vibe, but the feeling you get on the grounds is more of an energy that wraps itself around you. I knew right away. This was the place. This was where I wanted to get married…but would we be able to? Before I had a chance to explore dates, Erik and I suffered a major detour: back injuries. I’m not going to sugar coat it, it was one of the hardest situations we’ve encountered as a couple. However, as we forged ahead, with the help of TriCore Fitness (our Pilates studio) and Arcadia Health and Wellness (our chiropractor) we were able to make full recoveries, getting us back to wedding planning.
Picking the date was an important detail to both of us. We both wanted 10/10/2020, it just sounds sexy, right? Once we confirmed the date we were introduced to George Romero, the property’s Associate Director of Events and Sales, he handles all of the wedding planning for the property. Not only did he make everything easy for us, he made sure it was perfect. He patiently worked with us on scheduling and all our very specific needs to ensure the wedding went smoothly. Everything was installed on time, exactly the way we envisioned it. He also oversaw my favorite part of the entire process: the tasting!
I know everyone has at least one element of their wedding that they’ve looked forward to their entire life. For me, well…it was always the tasting. To finalize the menu Erik and I needed to taste all of the hors d'oeuvres, salads, entrees, cocktails and special desserts that the chef prepared especially for us. While most weddings leave you with a bad taste in your mouth, the food and cocktails were all exceptional.
Menu:
Hors d'Oeuvres
Arizona Medjool Dates, Fresh Cream, Pistachio
Lamb Meatball, Cucumber-Labne Sauce
Roasted Fig and Prosciutto Toast Point, Date Glaze
Salad
Blood Orange Salad, Beets Chips, Baby Kale, Spiced Pecans and Goat Cheese
Entrees
Market Fish, McClendon’s Arugula, Charred Creamed Corn, Tomato Jam
Black Angus New York Steak, Mushroom Risotto, Balsamic Vidalia Onions
Instead of a traditional wedding cake we challenged the chef to create a modern alternative that the two of us to enjoy together. The chef prepared a Caramelized Pineapple Coconut Cake with Coconut Cream and Lime Sorbet. The sorbet was served on top of the cake, which is then covered in coconut cream. The dessert offerred a dramatic experience as the chef finished it by flambeing it table-side! It was an enticing combination of delicious flavors and evocative presentation.
Our wedding was all about transforming every day experiences into a fantasy. So when it came to design we knew we wanted to go big. For the patio area we started with a focal point, large marquee letter lights that spelled out “MR & MR.” The rental service we used in Scottsdale was spectacular. Your Wedding Letters delivered, setup and picked up the letters for us, their service was entirely turnkey and we loved it. The design for the outdoor space was finished with bistro lights, tea light candles, and arrangements from Venus et Fleur. We carried the design aesthetic inside as well. The continuity was essential as the suite featured a glass wall with a sliding glass door creating unobstructed sight lines to the outdoor decor from the comfort of the dining room table. White pillar candles were placed throughout the room to set the mood while creating a beautiful atmosphere. Extravagant all white arrangements from Venus et Fleur became our centerpieces, styled with loose white rose buds, gardenias and countless white rose petals. Walking into the space felt like entering a dream, I’m smiling now just thinking about it.
We started small, picking our colors and ultimately our suits. We went with Sandro Paris, picking the same suit in two contrasting colors. Erik opted for a pale blue, while I chose a pink salmon tone. We were fortunate enough to obtain additional fabric which we used to create custom masks. Our tailor, Thomas Cleaners & Tailors, made us the masks and did an impeccable job of tailoring our suits. Quick tip, no matter how expensive or inexpensive your suit is, having it tailored will always make you look like the suit was custom made just for you. We finished our looks with matching Armani dress shirts, Ferragamo cuff-links and Gucci ties dyed to match our suits.
When it came to the hardware we researched countless jewelers and brands. Erik and I both knew what we wanted, something special that we could both wear every day to celebrate our love. Men are traditionally overlooked in this area, but why should girls have all the fun? It wasn’t until a friend recommended jeweler Michael Greene of Greene & Co Beverly Hills that our prayers were answered! Michael and his team streamlined the entire process. Not only is their work flawless, they are FAST! From design to delivery we had the rings in our possession in less than two weeks! Our designs are now available for purchase on the company’s website; my ring, Erik’s ring.
On 10/10/2020 our dear friend Aneesh blessed Erik and I by officiating our wedding! It was the culmination of months going back and forth trying to fit a wedding into our lives in the middle of multiple challenges... Between our back injuries and COVID we found ourselves feeling trapped... confused... frustrated... although we still managed to have our dream wedding. Erik and I shared one of the most magical nights of our lives. In fact the experience has been extraordinary... surreal, I’m still so full of gratitude that we were able to enjoy such an intimate and meaningful moment together.
I was so anxious and nervous that things weren’t going to work out or that it wouldn’t feel special since it was just the two of us. I was SO WRONG!!! Erik and I had a life changing experience... TOGETHER! If you’re currently knee deep in trying to plan your nuptials and don’t know what to do it’s time to take a minute, collect yourself and remember that this is YOUR time. It’s about love and celebration and all that’s good in your world. Relish every second and enjoy it because you fucking deserve it. I hope that when you make your decision you might consider having your own wedding party of two, but regardless follow your hearts and stay safe!